Me: *Removes my cat from my lap to do something else.* My cat: Father is...evil? Father is unyielding? Father is incapable of love? I am running away. I am packing my little rucksack and going out to explore the world as a lone vagabond. I can no longer thrive in this household. Follow The spiritual successor to Miette Patricia Lockwood me, lightly touching miette with the side of my foot: miette move out of the way please so I don't trip on you miette, her eyes enormous: you KICK miette? you kick her body like the football? oh! oh! jail for mother! jail for mother for One Thousand Years!!! manicgoblinnightmarewoman Might I also add 8 crimsonwastes cat when I'm snuggling him: I've never met you in my life. you bastard. you fiend. stop this at once cat when I'm busy doing something and can't pet him right that second: Where Is My Kisses From Mommy??? Where Is My Snuggles And Cuddles That I Crave So Dearly. You Are A Cruel And Unjust Mother And I Am Going To Scream fa shydestinybread Follow May i add the piece from artist Verbal Vomit MoTHER, FEED VS, FoR we Are ~ SKIN AND MOTHER CARES Not GER uS Glad to see we're all in agreement that cats talk like disparaged victorian children rowantheexplorer lam so incredibly glad we finally moved on from "i can has". Cats are clearly smart enough for advanced sentence structure and dumb enough to draw entirely incorrect conclusions about what they're talking about. dualclock Follow My cat, banging the cabnet door over and over and over: bang bang bang Me: you will not earn what you desire by banging the cabinet door. My cat: This is a test of wills, is it not? We shall see if your ability to put up with my incessant banging outlasts my eternal lust for snackie treats. Years of conditioning have hardened me for this purpose. bang bang bang Me: ksst! My cat, throwing herself to the ground like she's been shot: Oh! Oh I I have been assailed in my own home! Have mercy, have pity! Surely in the cruel darkness of your heart there is some mote of goodness that might stay your hand! Do not strike me, I pray you! Me: ok My cat, after waiting about 3 minutes: bang bang bang notcaycepollard Follow Chrome AM 16% Gamer Grandma when mother takes you to see the sail ships and she is in fine humour so you are rewarded for being an agreeable young boy eS your reply callmebliss Follow Can haz snackytreat ladyshinga Follow di dig eastcoastitnotes (source) THERES MORE THIS POST JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER dimir3331 Follow -From experience- My Cat, Father has abandoned me. It has been weeks and weeks since his snoring began in the room I cannot enter. Clearly I shall perish, but first I shall scream at him from the door, hoping he awakes; perhaps if I thrust myself bodily upon the door- Me, startling awake to the door being banged by a screaming cat: Go play with something else kitten! Cat: shame on you. Shame on your house. Thou hast thrust me into a barren waste. I simply wish to curl up on you. The myriad of toys and food out here are naught to me, but for your warmth. Me *relents*, leaving the door open. Wakes up to kitten clawing it's way across my chest in the middle of zoomies at 542,200 notes - iFunny
We think you’ll love these
